Wednesday, August 17, 2005

No ego required 

I got together with some people for an economics study group last night. At one point during the evening the conversation turned to feelings about the transition from responsible, emplyed professional to student. Most of us seem to have got past the "why I am I giving up a good job and a steady income to go back to school and accumulate huge debts?" bit. But now we're struggling with "why did I give up doing something that I was very good at and where I was responsible for doing important and difficult things well, to struggle to understand things that I'm sure aren't that complicated really?" The feeling of conscious incompetence certainly stops heads from getting too big. Also, lots of us have moved from being in situations where we were seen to be particularly able to being among lots of other similar people, and therefore pretty average.

My ego check today was finding out that I'd failed the maths test. I'm in good company, I hear it's about 20% of the class this year, but I will admit that I'm surprised. The solutions were posted on-line yesterday, and although I'd seen some places where I'd realised I'd made a mistake, I'd also seem some where I'd got things right that I'd been in doubt about. Evidently though I did much worse than I thought. We can't get our graded papers back until Monday, for some reason (I'm not sure why the delay, as they've been marked), but I'm going to be interested to get that feebcak. Passing the exam is mandatory, so that mean's the weekend is now set aside to study (would be really helpful to have the marked paper as a guide for what I need to concentrate on), there's a review session on Monday evening, and then the retake on Wednesday evening. Second time lucky, I hope.


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